Hello World

In the mean time, I provide you with this lovely quote from a story about Derek Jeter breaking up with Alex Rodriguez :(

"The reality is there's been a change in the relationship over 14 years and, hopefully, we can just put it behind us," Rodriguez said. "You go from sleeping over at somebody's house five days a week, and now you don't sleep over. It's just not that big of a deal."

During the offseason, former Yankee Darryl Strawberry said Jeter needs to "embrace" Rodriguez.

In theory, this story is about how they're not friends anymore, but to me it has a slightly different ring to it...

[ESPN]

Cross-posted from my other blog.

Whoops. Well, I guess I wasn't totally right about the Bears winning.* I'm pretty disappointed, so I can only imagine how actual Bears fans must feel right now. Sorry guys. I've got to say, I'm feeling very lost and confused now that Peyton Manning has won it all. Especially when you consider that Vinatieri missed a short kick in an important game, the world makes a little less sense now.

It is pretty great how racism is finally over, though.

Anyway, the countdown to the first day of Redskins season has begun. I think Rocky McIntosh is just about ready to make The Leap.

^* Devin Hester didn't let me down, though.

Cross-posted from my other blog.

A barrage of calls to local heavyweights about screen size yielded a muted response. A White House spokesman declined to discuss the president's TV, citing policy against talking about the residence part of the building. A State Department spokeswoman wouldn't forward a query to Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, a well-known football fan. "We answer foreign policy questions here," she said. And a representative for Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton (D-N.Y.) didn't respond to questions posed by telephone and e-mail about Clinton's TV.

The Pentagon opened up. "We do have televisions down here," said Lt. Col. George Wright, deep inside the U.S. Army Operations Center. Specifically, five screens of up to roughly 60 inches, at least two of which are high-def capable.

About 30 staffers are expected to work today. Would they flip on the game? "It is not unusual on Sundays for at least one of the televisions to have professional football on," Wright said.

How big is the venue?

"Stand by, we're going to count some tiles," he said. Coming back a short time later, he reported: "About 34 by 42 feet."

Read more about big screens in our nation's capital in the Washington Post story.

Cross-posted from my other blog.

Seriously, this is crazy. We're not talking about the Raiders and the Chargers here, we're talking about an even match pairing two extremely beatable teams. Sure, the Bears barely beat the Seahawks, but come on. This is the Colts. Grossman, despite his mediocrity, will be able to pick apart the Colts secondary with quick slants and play-action deep passes, since Indy will be loading up the box with linebackers to stop the Bears' running game. Peyton will throw three picks and Addai will run for 46 yards. And I'll be surprised if Devin Hester doesn't have at least one kick return over 50 yards.

Final score:
Bears 31, Colts 24

No time for a real post so here are a few bullet points:

• Jason Campbell:
  Obviously, we should have had this guy in earlier. Why is it that these decisions seem so obvious to most fans and sportswriters, yet escape the coaches who can actually implement them? I think it comes down to ego. Gibbs had bet his reputation on rehabilitating the franchise, with Brunell as his QB--replacing him meant admitting he screwed up one of the most important decisions the head coach has to make. Which leads me to my next point...


• Duckett:
  It's great that Ladell Betts ran for over a hundred yards. But I thought we had finally learned our lesson here. Seven rushing attempts backing up our backup running back is not great. I'll take the win and shut up, but this team has a terrible habit of keeping the best players on the bench for no clear reason. Might be time to change that.


• Redskins in general:
  It sure is too bad that we have no chance whatsoever of making the playoffs. It's very sad, because the NFC East is a shambles this year. A merely competent season would have probably won us the division. I won't bother mentioning it again, though--all we can do from here on out is try to improve for next year (and maybe keep the Giants out of the playoffs).


• Mike Vick:
  Enormous dickhead. Can someone explain to me why an NFL team would insist on sticking with a perennial loser with a bad attitude and herpes? He is a total coach killer.


• Junior Seau:
  The Boston Globe is reporting that Seau "appeared to break his arm" in yesterday's game. That's sort of like saying that the Hindenburg appeared to catch fire in 1937. His arm broke. In half. It looked like he had an extra elbow. It was Theisman-esque, and they'll never air it again. I have DVR and I couldn't bear to rewind and watch it again. Man, was that ever ugly.

Cross-posted from my real blog, which you should really be reading instead of this! I work my fingers to the bone putting together a nice blog for you and your friends and this is how you repay me! Anyway, this is the exact same entry as the blog post so you shouldn't bother clicking on this.

This week, Mike Wise of the Washington Post wrote a great two-part profile of the Washington Wizards' star point guard, Gilbert Arenas. A veteran player at the ripe old age of 24, he's long been one of the most eccentric guys in the NBA. Wise went beyond the now-clichéd stories of his basketball quirkiness and explored his personal life, past and present, and put together a compelling depiction of a real and troubled guy who's worked his ass off to get where he is--successful and famous and highly-respected--but with skeletons in his closet that he will never fully escape. I wrote earlier this week that there's some great sports writing being published right now, and this absolutely belongs in that category.

• Part I: The Psychic Scars That Shaped an NBA Star


• Part II: Arenas's Summer: Bizarre and Absurd


• Mike Wise's online chat about the series (in which Wise defends Arenas against a lot of criticism that struck me as harsh and, to a degree, absurd)

Did Green Day just equate the Superdome with a whorehouse?

Bo Jackson dominated Tecmo Bowl (a classic 1998 1988 Nintendo Entertainment System football game). Everyone who knows too much about video games knows that. But there's knowing something and then there's knowing something:

This clip is from Tecmo Super Bowl, the 1991 successor to Tecmo Bowl.

[Kissing Suzy Kolber]

I hope you were all watching the World Cup final yesterday. And I especially hope you were watching toward the end of overtime when the French capitaine, Zinedine Zidane, brutally head-butted an Italian player, earning himself an obvious red card. Lucky for him, Les Bleueuueueus held on for penalty kicks, but they lost anyway because another player missed his shot (Zidane is a notoriously-skilled penalty shot specialist).

To read the rest of this post, click here.

David Hasselhoff got kicked out of Wimbledon because he was too drunk.

Deadspin helpfully points out the best part of a generally excellent story: As the "lorries" escorted him from the "pitch," the once and future television star exclaimed, "Do you know who I am? I’m The Hoff."

Does it get any better than that?

Courtesy of the Boston Herald:

Dunkin’ mints ’86 Mets coins but Sox fans get chump change

The 1986 World Series is a bad memory for die-hard Red Sox fans. But Massachusetts-based Dunkin’ Donuts is literally minting money off of it in New York.

The company, which has its headquarters in Canton, started selling commemorative coins celebrating the 20th anniversary of the New York Mets World Series win over the Sox at Dunkin’ Donuts stores in New York, New Jersey and parts of Connecticut two weeks ago.

The 1986 World Championship, while a sweet success for the Mets, was a bitter experience for Sox fans, who watched the series title start to roll away as the ball went between Bill Buckner’s legs.

The Mets promotion, which is still running, had some members of Red Sox Nation wondering yesterday if Dunkin’ Donuts would create a David Ortiz dime or even a Manny Ramirez nickel.

“When are they going to make 2004 ones,” asked Billy Neader, 51, of Florida, a Sox fan.

Gee, Billy, I don't know. 2024????

The NBA is introducing a new ball:

The color has been brightened slightly and the channels — the black grooves that segment a basketball — have been minimized. The ball is also crafted from a composite of different materials, not the traditional leather casing that the NBA has used for years, and is softer and provides a better grip. The new ball also has a sleeker Spalding logo and two extra NBA logos stamped on it.

Although the most reported news, as far as I can tell, is the change from leather to a composite, I think the more significant change is the replacement of the old eight-panel design--the new balls are formed from just two panels that interlock:

Click on the image for a closer look.

It seems to me like the change in the seams on the ball, were I an elite player, might actually make a big difference. I don't know whether it would improve or reduce accuracy, but it sure does seem like a noticeable change. I wonder what the players will have to say about it.

The story I linked to is as much about marketing as it is about the ball itself--if you want the pure sports story, try this ESPN link.

I didn't watch the Italy-Australia match, but what I've read about it has led me to understand it this way: Australia outplayed Italy for the entire game, but an Italian player (surprise!) took a dive in the last minute of extra time to draw a penalty kick on what was, charitably speaking, an extremely controversial call by the referree. Italy, of course, converted the penalty kick for the game-winner and basically stole the game from the Australians.

To read the rest of this post, click here.

A couple notable quotes from this recap of last weekend's Buick Open tournament, in which known sexist Vijay Singh held off the best player in golf to win by four strokes:

Following his 17-foot putt for birdie at 17, Woods whipped the gallery into a frenzy with a gesture usually reserved for professional wrestling.

"I wanted to know how loud those drunk guys get," he said. "They were pretty hammered, they were wobbling as it was."

That is Tiger's first interesting quote since 2002!

Zach Johnson (69) tied for second -- his best finish this year -- at 20 under.

"The cream rises to the top, and that's the best cream there is," Johnson said.

Would anyone care to analyze that statement for a) hubris b) sexual innuendo or c) any kind of logical meaning?

To quote Toby Keith, I'm so happy I can't stop cryin'. It appears that the Washington Wizards have managed to trade Kwame Brown. For actual basketball players, who might contribute positively to the team's success! This is the best thing that has ever happened to a sports franchise in the history of athletic competition, with the possible exception of Jose Canseco's home run header.

Larry Hughes is leaving the Washington Wizards so he can go to the Eastern Conference Championships with Lebron James and the Cavaliers. That sucks, a lot. I have no idea who they might sign to come close to replacing him. I'm sad.

I'm predicting that next year the Cavs will win their division while the Wizards manage to barely make the playoffs and get their asses rocked by the Miami Heat.

Cruise, 42, was on a walkabout prior to the premiere of the latest adaptation of the H.G. Wells classic in London's Leicester Square on Sunday when a bogus journalist stuck a joke microphone in front of him.

As Cruise started to talk, he was squirted with water from the microphone prompting the star to lose his cool.

"I'm here giving you an interview, answering your questions and you do something really nasty ... you're a jerk ... jerk ... you're a jerk," the actor told the prankster in front of legitimate reporters.

Cruise said it was "disgusting" that someone should act in such a way.

"I really work hard to make people feel good," he said as he towelled himself dry.

Found in the Washington Post.

In other news, is Robert Horry ridiculous or what? This guy has won 5 NBA championships, soon to be 6, as an essential role player who always comes up huge in pressure-packed moments. I remember watching the Lakers win their three consecutive championships, with Horry pouring in clutch three-pointers to clinch close wins and to turn close losses in to miracle victories. He's not a great player statistically--he's a mediocre player, statistically--and the fact of the matter is that it's easy to remember only his clutch shots and ignore his misses. But when it comes down to it, he's responsible for many of the most incredible and timely shots in NBA playoff history--and way more shots than any but the biggest stars the league has had.

I would have written all of the above last week, or last month, or last year. But last night, Horry managed to exceed my expectations. Yes, his 4th quarter dominance was impressive, but was to my eyes overshadowed by Tim Duncan's utterly hilarious (to those of us who indulge in schaedenfreude) meltdown. But in overtime, Horry was incredible. His left-handed dunk through traffic against the best defense in the NBA was astonishing--if you ask me, the most impressive and gutsy points he's ever scored--and then he came up with a bum shoulder, missing his free throw Shaq-ly. So why was he still in there when the Spurs faced a 2 point deficit with 9 seconds left? And why did he take that 3 pointer? And why did he make it? I hate the Spurs, let me make that clear now, and I was relishing the prospect of Tim Duncan's epic chokejob resulting in their shameful loss. But how could you not admire Horry, at this point a pretty old guy running on vapors, taking the game in his own hands?

Bill Simmons writes about it in this column, which is pretty much spot-on (although a bit harsh to Rasheed Wallace, who made a bonehead but understandable defensive play, considering Ginobli single-handedly destroyed the Pistons in the first 2 games of the series).

I will be returning the color scheme to normal soon enough, but first, a little business to take care of.

As happy as I am about the Red Sox's improbable World Series victory last night, I'm sure it pales in comparison to the relief felt by anyone who grew up a Red Sox fan and suffered through years and years of competitive but fruitless performance, punctuated by occasional catastrophe and heart-breaking collapse. So I am very happy for the "long suffering Red Sox fans," who don't ever have to listen to a Yankees crowd chanting "1918" or "Who's Your Daddy?".

A couple of thoughts on last night's broadcast:

My understanding is that they forbade cameras from Boston's bars as a consequence of last week's unfortunate death of a celebrating fan. That's fine, I can understand it, but who the hell thought it was a good idea to show Boston fans celebrating in NEW YORK CITY???? That's like showing, uh... well, frankly, it's worse than any analogy I could think of. New York hates Boston (especially this month)--showing a New York bar at the moment of the Red Sox's ethereal victory is JUST PLAIN WRONG. It was so offensive, it made me a little nauseous last night.

And how awful was the woman doing the interviews after the game? I basically blacked out for about 20 minutes so, thankfully, I can't think of any real examples, but here's an idea of how it would have gone if she had interviewed the New York Rangers after their surprise victory in the NHL finals, to end a 50-some-year curse:

Woman: So, Mark Messier... can you believe it? After years of struggle and failure, you guys finally won!
Mark: Yeah, it's so great! I love these guys! They worked so hard!
Woman: What a terribly long time to go without a championship! Wasn't it horrible, being such losers for so long!
Mark: Well, I guess it was rough, but we are winners now! YEAH!
Woman: After years of misery, you got the win you desperately needed. Do you still feel like losers?
Mark: Shut the fuck up, lady! WE WON! STOP ASKING ABOUT THE PAST FOR TEN FUCKING MINUTES AND LET US ENJOY THE MOMENT!

It was something like that.

So, yeah. Go Sox. And thank you for winning quickly so I can return to my regularly scheduled programming (expect West Wing and OC entries very soon).

Man, the Red Sox are doing all they can to give their fans every variety of anxiety this postseason.

( here you will find an obsessive description of how )